Thursday 31 August 2017

An Englishman's guide to Iceland - Things you need to know

Here are 8 things you really need to know before you visit Iceland

1) The duty-free shops do not sell frozen peas - In November last year the Icelandic government launched a legal case against Iceland the supermarket re their use of the word Iceland. This was probably prompted by large numbers of distressed British tourists at Keflavik airport.

2) The duty-free shop does sell gift packs of Icelandic Cod Liver Oil if you have a friend or relative who's a bit sickly.


3) Ski wear for pigs, the next big thing - When the Vikings first travelled to Iceland from Norway they brought with them horses, sleep, cattle and pigs. However the pigs all died and so did the next lot and the next lot until the Vikings realised they simply couldn't adjust to Iceland. Consequently pigs in Iceland are reared indoors. So if you are looking for an idea to appear on Dragon's Den - try ski wear for pigs.

4) You can't commute by tractor - To help keep traffic flowing in Reykjavik, the city authorities have banned the use of tractors between 0730 & 0930 in the morning and 1530 & 1830 in the afternoon. This might be forward thinking and environmentally friendly but please, could you imagine if they stopped us going into to London each day on our Massey Ferguson's? There would be a riot.


5) No energy guilt - All Iceland's energy is green - hydro, wind and geo-thermal. In fact they produce more energy than they can use and have no real way of exporting it. Therefore you can leave your TV on standby and your lights on without feeling guilty.

6) There are no bees naturally in Iceland although there are some bee-keepers who keep them for a hobby.

7) Because of point 5 vast greenhouses are able to produce tomatoes, strawberries etc. However, because of point 6 they have to import Bumble Bees to do the pollination.

8) They love to show you the provenance of your food here, so it's quite normal to take you out to watch whales or puffins and then to offer them on a menu.

Item 5 - A wild duo of lightly smoked puffin ......... straight out of Masterchef that one!

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